I’ve come to a point in my life where I’m realising I’m becoming increasingly unhappy with different things. Mainly the state of my room, my money situation, my lack of organisation and university.
My room is a work in progress. It actually looks like a bomb has hit it at the moment. I am planning on re-painting my room and also getting new furniture. I’ve been unhappy with how tacky my room has looked for a while now. My walls were plastered with posters, I don’t have enough storage space and I just have crap everywhere, pretty much. I need a good week or two off to sort through everything in my room, pull out all my furniture, paint my walls and install new furniture. The problem is, I don’t think this is going to happen for at least another month or two. I guess I just need to put aside some time, even if it’s only half an hour a day, to sort out a different draw or at least do SOMETHING. I also need to measure up my room (and my bed – the only piece of furniture I plan to keep) so I can pick out which furniture from IKEA (I’ve got a large list of things I like, I need to narrow it down) I want to buy. I also need to decide on a wall colour. I’m thinking just plain white walls, with black around the cornices so my room looks larger and neater. Then I can have paintings or photos hanging from my walls also. I can picture what I want in my head, but it’s tough to sort it all out. Anyway, I’m pretty sure my room is playing a large part in what’s making me unhappy right now. I want somewhere attractive to spend my time whether I be studying or unwinding. At the moment my room just makes me feel disgusting.
Secondly, I’m having trouble sorting out my funds. I’m always wanting more money, but I’m just not getting the hours I need at work. I’m reluctant to look for another job because (despite the huge rant here) I don’t mind working there, the work isn’t hard, my hours are fairly flexible (it’s pretty easy to take time off which is good because I go to lots of concerts and enjoy travelling sometimes too) and the pay is fairly high for retail and I’m afraid if I go elsewhere, it won’t meet my standards! The job isn’t really the problem though, it’s my ability to stick to a budget. I always manage to pay my bills (phone, gym and laptop repayments) but the amount of money I can spend is very inconsistent – some weeks I will splurge on something nice for myself, other weeks I won’t even be able to afford to buy a bottle of water. I also don’t have any savings. At all. I really need to sit down, set up a budget and STICK to it. If anyone has any suggestions or links to helpful resources, this would be very much appreciated!
My frustration with my lack of organisation and uni kind of go hand in hand. At the beginning of this semester I came down with some sort of sickness and was in bed for three weeks (not to mention being sick for about three months prior to that and then taking a month or two to recover from the sickness). Since then, I have had no motivation to do much at all. I’ve been skipping uni a lot, I dropped two courses (which I am taking over Summer) and I still don’t manage to get my work done until the very last minute. For some reason, I’m thinking that becoming more organised in other areas of my life – such as redoing my room and sorting out my money – will make me happier with uni too. I’m looking forward to next year really, starting all new subjects and pretty much starting afresh.
I feel like I have too many things to focus on and that my life is one big to-do list but nothing really ever gets done. It’s frustrating and upsetting but I just can’t seem to get started on doing the things I outlined above. I know what I need to do, but I can’t get into it because either I’m always too busy, or I just lack the energy and enthusiasm to start. So, I’m asking readers to comment me with inspirational words, links, whatever that may help me with my troubles!
I think I need a holiday from reality! … and then to come back and completely reinvent my life. Sigh.